Toilet Paper Is Over The Top!

Over the top. That's how it's gotta hang! Allow me to wipe away the confusion: Toilet paper rolls are best installed with the paper dispensing over the top of the roll toward the user, not with the paper falling back away from the user and dispensing from underneath the roll. Many people have an opinion on this sensitive (t)issue. Some people just don't give a crap. I do just about everyday and when I reach for a slice I want to feel clean safe and comfortable. It comes down to these three primary issues: hygiene, safety, and ergonomics.

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1) Hygiene - Having the paper draped over the top of the roll eliminates the need to insert one's hand (fingers and knuckles) into the TP roll cavity where boogers poop and pee from other users may be hangin' out. When the TP is fed under the roll, so as to dispense from within the cavity, one's hand must risk brushing the inside of this cavity and most likely picking up unwanted travelers . When dispensed like this (over the back of the roll) it may also drop down beneath the cavity and hang flush with the wall. This leads to the issue of safety (in addition to remaining a hygiene threat due to the fact that the wall is another landing zone for boogers poop and pee (ladies may ask, Pee? yes, remember, guys splatter when peeing from a standing position - those drops can go anywhere!) because one's knuckles are sure to brush against the wall while severing the wiping strip from the roll.

2) Safety - I have gotten slivers in my knuckles from reaching (albeit too quickly) for the TP as it lay flush against a rough wooden wall - a result of it being fed, the wrong way, over the back of the roll. I have also received cuts and scrapes from sharp bolts and rusty washers poking out of the toilet roll cavity. (Yes, as a musician I do find myself visiting unusual and often neglected bathroom locations. But anyone who lives in the South or who goes camping will encounter the same conditions.) Remember - any flesh wound received while reaching for TP is a sure way to mainline someone else's boogers poop and pee (see #1).

3) Ergonomics - TP draped over the top of the roll, towards the user, is always closer to the user. TP fed back and away from the user is always further from the user and thus more of an inconvenience. One could argue that having to reach further for toilet paper burns more calories but I find that the act of defecating burns enough calories as it is. Pooping always feels like losing weight too, doesn't it?

And there you have it. I hope that helps when it comes to hangin' your roll: over the top is the way go!

Drummer Ginger Baker (Cream) Stars in Documentary on His Life and Times in The Limelight

Drummer +Ginger Baker swears up a storm recounting his junkie's journey on the drums. Beware of Mr Baker is a must see documentary by +Jay Bulger for all music history buffs.

I met Ginger while playing drums at the old Cricket On The Hill in Denver sometime in the mid to late 1990s. Ginger came in the bar with Rupp's Drums owner +Bob Rupp. We drank whiskey, played drums and threw steak knives at the dart board (thanks +Denver Joe!). Here's a photo of me playing congas with singer/songwriter +Clay Cabe at The Cricket circa 2002: